Parents are human. We are susceptible to anger emotions stemming out of frustrations, struggles, arguments and disagreements or from just having a bad day. Sometimes we are upset with out young children for bad behavior or disobedience which is in order if delivered appropriately. And sometimes, we just have a bad attitude because we carry the weight of unfinished business on our shoulders.
But then there’s a lot of parents who shush every idea or opinion their child has. They allow their negativities to spill on innocent minds. I have seen it all too often and can visualize a heart break happening when a child is treated as an insignificant creature with no feelings.
I believe that there should be method in our madness as parents. Respect is a learned trait and a child can only learn it if they see us exemplifying it. It starts at home, like most character building does and the parent plays the biggest role. Verbal or physical anger towards a child is like planting seeds of disillusionment in their tender minds. When nourished with disrespect, their mind learns that behavior and adapts it. It is easy to be angry but very difficult to straighten the kinks that form in the minds of the children as a consequence. There is a simple rule I try to follow and I’d like to share it here.
When it isn’t the right time to talk to your child, excuse yourself politely, resist the temptation to snap, and get back to them at a later time with a controlled attitude. It’s all about how you carry your words, the tone, the body language and eye contact. A child’s mind is sharper than we know it to be as it isn’t loaded with worldly negatives. It hasn’t been covered with layers of dusty mental pollution or become selfishly consumed in the battle between me and I. They can feel an unillustrated emotion just by our presence and aura. And so keeping these facts in mind, I allow myself a healthy space so I can keep my sensibilities intact and offer to my child a fair discussion.