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Archive for September, 2012

PostHeaderIcon The days when you feel you’ve done something right…

Not that I’d like to take credit but a part of me feels a great sense of fulfillment today when I read a note my 6-year-old daughter wrote to her kindergarten teacher this morning:

Dear Mrs. M,
You were my kindergarten teacher last year. I’m now in 1st grade and have a new teacher. I’ve moved on but I still love you and will always be thankful for everything you have taught me. Love, S

Then she drew a heart and colored it, and gave it to me to check it for spelling errors. I asked her what made her write this note and she said, “mom it’s nice to let people know how you feel about them so they feel happy.” I have to confess that it was proud moment for me as a mother to know that my little child not only receives love but is capable of giving it back. That she can cultivate such thoughts and translate them into clear words at this age is indeed a virtue. As a mother now, my job is to make sure I nurture it so it blossoms.

I went to the bus stop earlier than usual today as I was eager to hear what her teacher had to say. I had also been thinking about her all day and smiling to myself, imagining what she must have been going through when she handed over that note. Was her heartbeat racing? Was she nervous and curious to know how her teacher would react? When she came out of her bus smiling, a little wider than usual, I knew she had exciting news.

Her teacher was so impressed with her thoughts that she nominated her for this special principal’s award that is given for extraordinary behavior in acts of service, display of leadership, kindness and courtesy and such. She will soon be called out during assembly and will receive free ice cream at lunch time.

She’s happy camper today but is back to her kiddy business, but I sit here overjoyed by my child’s little display of affection. Maybe I’m making a big deal out of it but I want to because it’s these little things that when put together, make a person who they are, and I’m liking where she’s headed.

 

 

PostHeaderIcon Making it all better

There are times in our lives when we face disappointments and they bother us and nag us, and we want to dwell in the pain of it all. The human heart needs some time alone, so it can talk to itself and allow itself to heal.

There are a few times like these when I sit on the corner chair in my family room and stare out the window. I’m not really thinking of anything specific, just watching the leaves dance to the wind, and a car drives by quietly…yet it makes so much noise in the otherwise subtle sceneries where my thoughts were enjoying the solitude. Now the wind is stronger and the leaves are swaying with the branches, and one part of the tree is lighter than the other because the sunlight is shining on it that way. It’s starting to get a little chilly now and some leaves have changed their color already. And when you look at all of that, you realize the the circle of life is so perfectly designed.

Then all of a sudden I have this incredible urge to cry and my head feels full. And I’m alone so I guess it’s good to shed a few tears. I wonder if those leaves can see me like I see them. And if they can, they must wonder what I’m up to. Or perhaps they feel sorry for me and think I’m lonely, unlike them, as they grow in clusters.

So maybe that’s my heart talking to itself, trying to find the reason for feeling this way. Sometimes we know the reason but are afraid to accept it. Or sometimes we’re just too hurt to say it. Whatever it is, we find a way to overcome our sadness. We find the courage to lift our spirits and understand that nothing always stays the same. And life must give us our share of suffering, however intense it is, because only then can we appreciate all the blessings we have in our lives.

Happiness can be hard to define but we all know what happy feelings are. Each one of us deserves happiness and are worthy of it. But like anything else, making yourself happy is also a decision. There are situations in our control and situations that are not. Like I could not control the car that disturbed my tranquility but I can control my location so I could choose to move away from that window and sit elsewhere. At the end, I feel it takes lesser strain on our hearts and minds to smile and move on than to dwell in a miserable place where everything is dark and gloomy…a little step at a time, but it can be done.

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