There are times in our lives when we face disappointments and they bother us and nag us, and we want to dwell in the pain of it all. The human heart needs some time alone, so it can talk to itself and allow itself to heal.
There are a few times like these when I sit on the corner chair in my family room and stare out the window. I’m not really thinking of anything specific, just watching the leaves dance to the wind, and a car drives by quietly…yet it makes so much noise in the otherwise subtle sceneries where my thoughts were enjoying the solitude. Now the wind is stronger and the leaves are swaying with the branches, and one part of the tree is lighter than the other because the sunlight is shining on it that way. It’s starting to get a little chilly now and some leaves have changed their color already. And when you look at all of that, you realize the the circle of life is so perfectly designed.
Then all of a sudden I have this incredible urge to cry and my head feels full. And I’m alone so I guess it’s good to shed a few tears. I wonder if those leaves can see me like I see them. And if they can, they must wonder what I’m up to. Or perhaps they feel sorry for me and think I’m lonely, unlike them, as they grow in clusters.
So maybe that’s my heart talking to itself, trying to find the reason for feeling this way. Sometimes we know the reason but are afraid to accept it. Or sometimes we’re just too hurt to say it. Whatever it is, we find a way to overcome our sadness. We find the courage to lift our spirits and understand that nothing always stays the same. And life must give us our share of suffering, however intense it is, because only then can we appreciate all the blessings we have in our lives.
Happiness can be hard to define but we all know what happy feelings are. Each one of us deserves happiness and are worthy of it. But like anything else, making yourself happy is also a decision. There are situations in our control and situations that are not. Like I could not control the car that disturbed my tranquility but I can control my location so I could choose to move away from that window and sit elsewhere. At the end, I feel it takes lesser strain on our hearts and minds to smile and move on than to dwell in a miserable place where everything is dark and gloomy…a little step at a time, but it can be done.